I have spoken about giving up memorising the Qur'ān, feeling unworthy, and depression. I have spoken about the importance of the why and the rewards behind memorising the Qur'ān.
But I want to remind you as we approach Ramadan, that if you struggle, if you keep stating and stopping, if you feel like giving up, at the very least do not leave the Qur'ān.
Your struggle is not the Qur'ān
It's your ego. It's your mindset. It's your procrastination and all the fake society led ambitions you hold. It's the knowledge you neglect and the contradictions you live. It's the negative habits you knowingly nurture. It’s the unhealthy things you feed your ego, mind, body and soul.
The struggle is never with our Qur'ān.
It never is and never will be. It’s with our own selves. That is where your fight is.
In the short term it’s intense. In the long term, it’s everything. Keep fighting.
What’s the reason we keep battling ourselves?
It’s ourselves. It’s you against you.
When the good in you stops resistance against bad forces, you begin to fall on an individual level, this then trickles into society.
Focus on growth. Focus on surrounding yourself with positivity. People who make you better every day.
How do we deal with all these challenges?
Start within. Take one thing you do that you need to change. Take it on for 40 days, even if you need to fake it. You will find a difference.
Look at this beautiful encouragement from the Prophet (ﷺ)
These are the words of a sister:
"Subhān Allāh, I [was] thinking about when I was in my early days of Hifdh, being discouraged from doing it so much that Allāh sent me a sign through a dream of the Prophet (ﷺ).
I was around 10 years old max.
That night I remember having many dreams and later in the night in one of my dreams my dad was driving somewhere and he said “Aminah, I’m going to take you somewhere- to see the Prophet Muhammad (ﷺ).”
So we drove until we reached an open space.
It seemed like a wudū' area - everything was sparkling and marble and on one of the wudū' place the Prophet (ﷺ) was sitting. He’d clearly just finished making wudū' and water was dripping from his beard. Subhān Allāh, when people describe the Noor (light) on his face, it’s an understatement. Wallāh, words cannot explain the beauty on the face of our Beloved Nabi (ﷺ). He smiled at me and we spoke.
He’s just as they describe him, not too tall or too short not fat nor skinny but the only different thing was that in my dream his hair was white. I remember doubting the dream for a while until I asked my Ustādh who explained the meaning of that as well.
Anyways he (ﷺ) asked me if I was doing Hifdh and when I answered yes, he asked me to recite for him. I was on Surah Sād and I recited for him and I wasn’t nervous at the moment. Just felt more contentment than I can explain while reciting.
Then he asked my sister if she was doing Hifdh and she was on Surah Yasin and she recited as well. The Prophet (ﷺ) encouraged me saying how good it is that I’m doing Hifdh and after we finished speaking he asked, “Have you ever seen my Masjid?” and when I replied no. He told me to come with him and he’d show me and before we left I woke up.
He was so easy to talk to. So gentle and kind and the Noor radiated off him. May Allāh allow us all to see him on our dreams and meet him in the ākhirah - ameen. I remember my parents being so happy when i told them this dream Alhamdulillāh for their support always. May Allāh reward them endlessly for supporting me and my siblings in memorising the Qur'ān."
This was a young student who was encouraged by the Prophet (ﷺ) directly. Don't let anyone tell you that you shouldn't memorise the Qur'ān. That anyone includes your own thoughts and whispers. Keep trying. Even it it's an āyah a week! Make sure you do something today. I know how hard it can be but you must keep your connection alive.
This is not a path of regrets
What do you regret the most? This was a question put to those on their death bed. What were the 5 most common answers that dying patients gave to a nurse?
- “I wish I’d had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me.”
- Males missed family and companionship and said "I wish I hadn’t worked so hard"
- Meaning work should enable you to do more of what you love, not less.
- “I wish I’d had the courage to express my feelings.”
- “I wish I had stayed in touch with my friends”
- “I wish I had let myself be happier”
But the path you are on, brothers and sisters, is not one of regrets.
It is special.
It is of hope!
Your continued sincere connection with the Qur'ān is something to rejoice! Despite thousands of hours of struggle, not one person before you (or after you) ever regrets trading his or her time with the Qur’ān.
Keep the connection alive.
Ramadān is around the corner. The month of the Qur’ān. You always want to meet a specific goal with the Qur’ān. You show what you’re capable of. You feed your body and your nafs with it’s every need. Don’t starve your ruh (your soul). It’s crying out for sustenance. The primary source is the Qur’ān.
The only regret is to regret that you didn’t!
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