A student was struggling to memorise as little as three āyāt of the Qur’ān. So he complained to his teacher. The teacher asked him, “How is your relationship with your mother?”
It turned out that the relationship was bad.
So the teacher advised him, “Be good to your mother, and the Qur’ān will be good to you.”
So the student took this advice and began to make efforts with his mother. He began to speak to her politely. He began to display respect, love, and reverence towards her. He would remove his own ego out of the equation and display patience and understanding. Do you know what happened?
He was now able to memorise 2 or 3 pages a day and he finished half of the Qur’ān in a year!
Our relationships matters
One of the most important matters in this world is our relationships. And at the top of that hierarchy, is our parents. At the height of it, our mothers.
The individual, in the story I’ve mentioned, was new to Islam. He had to make a big effort with his mother. He had to ask for pardon. He learnt that year that is things are not going well in life, then he had to honour his mother. He learnt how blessings (barakah) began to flow into his life through honouring his mother.
The respect of our parents is something that is often spoken about today because we’re facing challenges from young people, particularly among late-Millennials, Generation Z and Gen Alpha. There’s an experience of disrespect, egotism, rage and increasing psychological challenges coming from them. When you go to mosques and speak to elders, they speak about how their children have no respect for them. They speak about how bad they are with their language and behaviour. You know perfectly what I’m talking about.
At the same time, there isn’t an emphasis on educating our elders on what changes are happening due to technology, the internet, changes in environment, food, drink and society that are impacting our children. We’re not discussing how they themselves should also adapt to the needs of the time.
However, there is little emphasis on our relationships as a whole. Our relationships can make or break. Violating the rights of another is a big deal, so much so, it will weigh heavy against us in the hereafter!
When we are memorising the Qur’ān, we can get so focused on methods, techniques, health, mindset, routine, and tactics that we forget people. People are as important. And the people that matter most are your parents.
There’s not a particular need for me to remind you about what the status of the mother is, why she is important, what the status of the father is and why he is important. But you ought to remind yourself. Remind yourself that she is a key to paradise. If you are a mother yourself, then also know that Hadīth that mentions paradise lies beneath your feet also applies to you. The Hadīth means that you have the power to unlock the potential in your child and make them a person of paradise. You hold the power of influence and care to guide them on to that path. Remind yourself of the power of the prayers that your mother and father make in your favour. Remind yourself that the obedience of Allāh is likened to the obedience of your parents. Remind yourself of what Allāh has told you in regard to their honour and respect.
Remind yourself of what your Prophet (ﷺ) used to say about your parents and their status. They have a key that unlocks the Mercy of Allāh. Ibn ‘Abbās said he never knew an action that was more beloved to Allāh then kindness towards a mother. The pleasure of Allāh is connected to the pleasure of your father.
Don’t live to regret anything. Don’t make your move too late. Think about those who have come into Islam but they lost their parents who never accepted Islam. They can’t even pray for them.
The words of Allāh and His Messenger (ﷺ) are enough.
But here’s a video from someone who has never had that luxury but realised when it was too late.
May Allāh give me and us all the ability to be obedient and recognise the realities of what we speak.
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