Don’t Force Memorizing The Quran, Build It Instead

Motivating children (and even ourselves) for Qur'ān memorization (Hifz) can be a hard task.

It can feel heavy. Kids memorizing Qur'ān and want to become ḥuffāẓ are often let down by external factors.

You want them to become ḥuffāẓ. You want them to carry the Book in their hearts. But many parents fall into one trap:

They force Hifz… instead of building it.

In this piece, I want to share a few stories:

• How a young man “fell into” Hifz without planning to.
• How adults later in life found their way back to memorisation once pressure stopped.
• How one person memorised despite not knowing how to read properly at first — and the simple method he used.
• I reflect on the story of a well-known Mufti who, despite his having no intentions, ended up memorising the Qur'ān. I also consider my own upbringing and draw some lessons for you and your journey.

From these, I hope you can take a gentler, stronger way to build Hifz in yourself and your children.

How a Young Man Fell in Love With Qur’an Memorisation

As a child, this young man was like many of us.

He went to school. He had his own interests, his own little world. Qur'ān was there in the background, but Hifz was not a “big plan”. He had to learn Qur'ān.

After Fajr, he and his siblings would sit together for 15–30 minutes. Their elder brother, a Ḥāfiz, would supervise them.

There was no big speech of:

“You must finish the whole Qur’an.”

It was much simpler:

“Let’s see if you can learn this sūrah.”

One sūrah. Then another. Then another.

Bit by bit, this boy began to enjoy it. Hifz shifted from “something we have to do” to “something I’m good at and want to keep doing.” Over time, during his student years, he completed memorising the Qur’an.

He eventually finished his Hifz during his years of study as a student.

We don’t know which exact moment made him “fall in love” with Hifz.

But we know this:

• He was not forced.
• He was given a process, time, and small wins.
• He was invited into Hifz, not dragged through it. It was a journey.

That is the key. It wasn’t about finishing all 30 ajzāʾ from day one. It was about testing:
“Can you hold on to this one sūrah? Good. Let’s try another.”

Don't force Hifdh, build it

When I shared this story online (@qarimubashir), people began to reply with their own experiences. A lot of pain came out.

"I was forced at a young age but I liked it when years passed. I felt I was forced and I wasn't able to concentrate, I felt bored. So I just paused and when my relatives asked, I said I've completed only this much and they discouraged me by saying, 'oh only this much' and I felt very upset. So I became rude whenever someone asked me about my hifz. Eventually I stopped memorizing new juz' but I revised the old ones by myself.

And alhamdulillah I got motivated by few pages in instagram @qarimubashir ,@hifz__tips etc.. and started my hifz again from where I left in this lockdown. It's nearly been a year and alhamdulillah I've completed 5 juz'. This may be a little and still people say me things to me but I don't care. I know what I've learned."

Another said:

"I used to struggle as a kid, it took me 16 years to even be fluent. Interest in hifz has come just because now I'm not being pushed into it, but I just want to have some portion of it in my heart and connect with it more than I did as a child."

Look at the pattern:

• As children, they were pushed.
• They felt bored, shamed, and discouraged.
• They stopped.
• Later, when the pressure eased and choice came back, so did their interest.

This does not mean Hifz is easy or that parents should never push at all. It means:

Pressure without purpose crushes.
Purpose with support builds.

A student needs two things:

1. Understanding – Why am I doing this?
2. Capacity and desire – Am I ready for this pace? Do I want it?

Without those, forcing more and more pages only builds resentment.

These are very common findings. In fact, I went through the same and I talk about it in my posts and book. It is fundamental that a student understands why they are memorising. It is also fundamental that they have the capability paired with the desire to do so.

Build Hifz Through Small Achievable Goals

If you want your child (or yourself) to have a strong relationship with the Qur’an, think in small ladders, not giant leaps.

I once spoke to a parent whose children loved art. She wanted them to build a long-term habit of memorisation.

I came up with a simple “progression ladder” for them.

• The children chose their favourite thing in the world — an animal, a place, a character.
• They drew a huge outline of it on a large sheet of paper and stuck it on the wall.
• Every time they finished a short memorisation session, they were allowed to add one line or a few dots to the drawing.

The drawing grew with their Hifz.

Day by day, line by line, their picture slowly appeared. They could see their consistency. They weren’t just “doing sabaq”. They were building something.

You can adapt this idea in many ways:

• A sticker chart.
• A Qur’an “path” where every āyah is a step.
• A tree where each leaf represents a page revised.

Children respond to what they can see, touch, and track. Check out the pointers on visual learning.

Connection Through Meaning

Many adults need meaning to stay connected to what they memorise. Children benefit from this too.

When my students finished Sūrah al-Ghāshiyah, we didn’t just tick it off and move on. We tried to live its āyāt in a small way.

• We watched short clips of mountains, camels, and open landscapes.
• If we could, we went outside and spoke about the sky, the earth, and creation.
• We linked specific āyāt to things they could see and feel.

You don’t need complex tafsīr circles with young children. Simple, real-life links are enough:

• “This rain you see? Allah talks about rain here.”
• “This mountain in the video? Look how strong it is. Allah made it like that.”

Everyone connects differently. Your child might connect through stories, art, nature, sound, or routine. Your job is to ask:

“What actually makes this child light up?”

That is part of what I call building Qur’an memorisation.

You are not just piling pages into a tired brain. You are building an experience they will remember with warmth.

Everyone connects differently, the question is what connects you?

This is what I call "building" Qur'ān memorisation. You're "building" an experience that they will fall in love with.

I Was Not Forced to Memorise the Qur’an

When I look back at my own childhood, I see three main things:

1. A father who dreamed that at least one of his children would memorise the Qur’an.
2. An environment where Qur’an recitation was always playing.
3. A nurturing teacher who noticed and encouraged me.

Qur’an was in the car — not just as a Mus'haf on a shelf, but as a voice in the air.

I would listen to beautiful recitations and try to copy them. I didn’t think:

“I want to become a Ḥāfiz.”

I just loved the sound.

At madrasah, my teacher noticed my voice and my interest. He encouraged me to recite more. I began to listen to Egyptian reciters and fell in love with the art of recitation.

Only then did the thought of Hifz take shape.

At around 12 or 13 years old, I was asked:

“Do you want to memorise the Qur’an?”

And I said yes.

Again, this is important:

• There was exposure.
• There was encouragement.
• There was a choice.

The love of memorisation grew; it was not injected by force.

There are so many ways Allah draws people to His Book. Many of them start with quiet exposure, gentle encouragement, and a heart that is given space to say “yes”.

When Hifz Is Hard: A Story of Grit and Method

Not every Hifz story is soft. Some are full of pain, struggle, and effort. But even then, there is a method and a choice.

One brother I heard about never learnt how to read the Qur’an at all. He couldn't read but...

• He began memorisation almost “blind”, without strong reading skills.
• The first 5 ajzāʾ were a huge struggle.
• The first 15 ajzāʾ were, in his words, “very difficult”.
• Yet he still finished his Hifz in about 1.5 years.

How did he do it?

He used a very simple, very intense routine:

• He started with around 8 lines a day.
• From Dhuhr to ‘Asr, he would sit with the Mushaf and repeat each āyah 41 times while looking.
• After Maghrib, he would memorise and try to recite that same portion from memory.

There were many nights when he was disciplined harshly for mistakes. He couldn’t sleep from the pain. So much to the point that once he got beat so much that his hands bled and the blood went onto his mushaf. His mother then said she would wrap his mushaf into a cloth and make it a witness before Allah. I’m not sharing this to praise that treatment — it is not a model — but to show how much hardship he went through because he hadn’t learnt to read well, yet still refused to quit.

Later in life, he simplified his advice for others into a gentler method:

Take 15 minutes after Fajr.
Memorise a small portion — about three lines, or one long verse.

• Read it aloud, with the Mushaf, at least 10 times or more.
• Break it into half a line + half a line if needed.
• Listen to the audio of that portion.

During the week, take one hour to revise all of what you memorised.
If it becomes difficult, rememorise it and read it to someone, or record it and listen back.

This is not magical. It’s repetitive. Simple. Boring, even. But it works.

Two Students Who Came Back to Hifz

He later met two students who had already memorised Qur’an once, but had forgotten all of it.

They decided to start again.

Their routine was:

• 30 minutes, three times a day.
  • Morning: learn half the new lesson.
  • Later in the day: revise and read that half.
  • In between, they would recite that portion in their ṣalāh.

By the time they read to the teacher, they had already recited that new portion at least 11 times in prayer.

They rememorised the Qur’an over three years, then spent another full year just on revision.

Another student, with serious eyesight issues, could not read like others. His method?

• He repeats each line letter by letter,
• Up to 100 times,
• Until it settles.

He is now on his third juzʾ of memorisation.

Different stories. Different challenges. But the same pattern:

• Small time slots.
• High repetition.
• Clear routine.
• Long-term patience.

A Simple Routine You Can Try

If you want to apply a gentle version of this in your own life or with your child, here is one way:

Daily (15–30 minutes):

1. After Fajr (or another calm time), choose 2–3 lines.
2. Read them aloud from the Mushaf 10–20 times.
3. Break them into half-lines if needed.
4. Listen to the same portion once or twice.
5. Later in the day, try to recite them from memory:
   • In your sunnah prayers.
   • In nafl.
   • Or aloud while walking.

Weekly (1 hour):

1. Go over everything new you’ve memorised that week.
2. If something is weak, don’t panic.
   • Rememorise it.
   • Read it to someone.
   • Or record yourself and listen back.

This is how you build Hifz:

• You give it a fixed place in the day.
• You keep the daily target small.
• You give yourself many chances to repeat.
• You treat forgetfulness as a normal part of the process, not a reason to quit.

Hifz Is Not Just Memorisation — It’s Attachment

Most struggles in Hifz don’t come from memory issues.
They come from emotional distance from the Qur’an.

Think about it:

• Children memorise the theme songs of shows they love — not because it’s easy, but because the attachment is strong.
• Adults memorise painful moments and conversations word-for-word — not because they trained their brain, but because it mattered.
• People memorise lyrics, scenes, quotes, jokes — all effortlessly.

So why does Qur’an feel heavy?

Because we expect memorisation…
without building attachment first.

Attachment comes from:

• warmth
• meaning
• presence
• routine
• emotion
• safety
• familiarity
• relevance
• beauty

If parents build attachment, memorisation eventually becomes the natural next step.

If adults build attachment, consistency becomes easier.

To the Parents (and Students) Reading This

Your job is not only to:

• schedule
• supervise
• monitor
• reward
• correct

Your bigger job is to build an emotional container around the Qur’an.

A child must feel:

• safe around Qur’an
• seen when they try
• encouraged when they fail
• valued when they progress
• connected when they recite

Once those conditions exist, the heart opens.

And a heart that opens… memorises.

If you’re a parent:

• Your child does not need you to shout them into Jannah.
• They need you to walk with them to the Book.
• To show them that the Qur’an is part of normal life — in the car, in the kitchen, before sleep.

If you’re a student:

• You do not need to finish in one year to be “worthy”.
• You need to show up with what you have, daily, even if it’s only a few lines.
• You need to understand why you want Hifz, and build from there.

Don’t force Hifz.

Build it.

Build the environment.
Build the love.
Build the routine.
Build the meaning.

And then ask Allah to do what only He can do: place His Words firmly in your heart and keep them there until you meet Him.

For Adults: You Need an “Anchor Emotion”

This is the part 99% of adult memorisers never consider.

Adults think:

“I should memorise because it’s good.”
“I need more discipline.”
“I should be like those who finished.”

That doesn’t build attachment.

To anchor yourself to the Qur’an long-term, you need a core emotion you return to:

• Awe
• Comfort
• Beauty
• Curiosity
• Healing
• Belonging
• Hope
• Escape
• Meaning
• Security

One of these must become your Qur’anic “home feeling.”

Once you identify this —
Hifz stops feeling like pressure and starts feeling like return.

Don’t just build memory.
Build attachment.

Ask:

• What makes me love the Qur’an?
• What makes my child feel connected?
• What emotion do I want them to feel when they look at the Mushaf?
• What feeling do I want to return to when I memorise?

This is deeper than advice about routine or repetition.

It’s about shaping the heart so that Hifz becomes:

• a need
• a comfort
• a desire
• a companion

Not an obligation.

May Allah grant you sincerity, consistency, and a deep love for His Book. May He make your efforts a means of guidance for you, your children, and those who come after you.